TODAY I CHOOSE TO BE FREE
62
Rising above pain is not easy
Our ego, pride trick us into pretending it’s breezy
Allowing our spirit to detach from it all
Takes faith-filled courage, because we will fall.
Events in the last 30 days seem so real, are but a mirage
Finding the core, an emotionally exhausting barrage
Wouldn’t it be easier to bury mistakes we’ve made?
Continue at 90 miles a minute through life, as if in a motorcade.
“Don’t analyze everything to a snit”
Voices heard, yet they are shouting from the pit
To risk being emotionally vulnerable
The worthy challenge toward light, is a test often feeling unbearable
We know we have felt this same way before
People and circumstances change, we begin to keep track of the score
It is not the first time we’ve been hurt
Cannot stop being aware of each, even with our face in the dirt.
Over and over the cycles repeat
Confronting them all, builds up the heat
Skipping even one can keep our blind spot from seeing the red flag
Could they really go back that far – to a simple game of tag?
Today I choose to be free
I saw the deepest fear in me
It had been controlling the decisions of my life
Over and over, repeating the same strife
I’d hung onto the false belief so tight
My subconscious Genie, making sure I was right
I’d accepted the job of protecting them
In a world filled with deceit and mayhem
Yet one by one they’re separated, lost
Determined to attain independence at all cost
Wallowing, threading through the pain and brine
I finally realized, their struggles are the same as mine.
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Oooh I like this. Yes parenting can be painful. At least this is what I think you are speaking of and how we must let them go at a certain time to learn as we have.
Thank you Smireles. Pain and illness are very real. Seeing those repeated threads, no matter who the players, give us the key to beliefs or issues we have to overcome - before they convince us to identify with the pain, rather than who we really are. Appreciate you coming by and your comment!
Aloha ralwus - we can indeed learn much as parents can't we? You read my own issue and deepest fear perfectly. It was my job, but to stay in the role of protector indefinitely, is to dishonor both parent and child and inevitably diminish growth and freedom. No matter what we have to let go of, we know we have to long before we're willing to do so it seems. Very glad you liked it :)
In the last three stanzas you brought everything home, SEM Pro. Everything came full circle. Here is one of my favorites:
Today I choose to be free
I saw the deepest fear in me
It had been controlling the decisions of my life
Over and over, repeating the same strife
It reminded me of samsara: the cycle of birth, death and rebirth in Buddhism. It makes perfect sense. It makes you all the more wise to point this out and in the world of "deceit and mayhem," it's best to be honest at all times. No one ever likes to be deceived, not even children! Empathy goes a long way, I've learned. I've always been told that I'd make a great parent one day...I hope I do!
Thanks for this, SEM Pro!
Very nice!!! to be free, to recognize the inner strife holding us back, to do something different, something new. To be free from me! Very beautifully written, thanks!
Thank you dohn. It does come from very real Buddhist beliefs. As our repeated issues cycle, coming to the core in order to let go. Your point is wonderfully reiterated - to be totally honest with ourselves is often the toughest, but the only path to empathy and understanding. You will make a GREAT dad, I have no doubt about it!!! Your inner joy will connect with them creating a bond stronger than love :)
Always a pleasure to have you come by and comment emo! Yes, beyond parenting, it is the strife and pain that hold us back from the new - and better. We are not the roles and when we hold on so tight believing we are, doubt seeps in. The easiest way to ensure the next change will indeed be better, is to let go of the old - choosing to be free.
SEM Pro, The balance is the equilibrium we seek unwittingly so we must continually refocus and notice the sameness of our futility, ergo the detachment of selflessness ~ letting go ... Love it... May I link to your site its a fine model of this meaningful perspective of balance...
Links are always an honor loua! Thank you :)
I like how you begun by declaring a reality some of us find hard to accept, "Rising above pain is not easy
Our ego, pride trick us into pretending it’s breezy
Allowing our spirit to detach from it all
Takes faith-filled courage, because we will fall". Such personal acknowlegement is key to being free. What a lovely poem. Love it!
Thank you so much IslandVoice! As another cherished kindred spirit of the ultimate joy of gratitude, it is so true. We can be grateful for all, even the pain as a guide to show us what we're hanging onto that's not working, for us or anyone in our lives. Sometimes it seems so strange that we hang on to those erroneous beliefs and pain, our egos making us think THAT is easier than admitting we were wrong. Aloha dear Lady!
Thank you for this beautiful poem! "Over and over the cycles repeat"... this line holds so much truth for me! The entire poem does, but this one tugs at my soul. Thank you for being here with us! :D
Oh k@ri - you know how to tug lovingly at my soul! Thank you so much. What a wonderful thing to say :) As on one of yours - you're never alone in those feelings Darlin' - nor when you need a friend...
Aloha, more power and stay free!
I was so touched by this! Thank you for sharing-beautiful beautiful beautiful!!!!!!!
SEM Pro, this is a beautiful poem. Thanks for sharing. Detachment is an idea that I am trying to practise more and more. I have a tendency to get too emotional, so I thank you for the clip fron Depak Chopra. There are no coincidences, only miracle or devine intervention.
Thanks for sharing...
Staying free is the challenge dear IslandVoice! I intend to do my best in each moment - each day :) Aloha
Thank you so much Laura! I very much appreciate you coming by and commenting! Hope to see you again :)
Ahh my dear friend DynamicS :) I don't believe there is such a thing as "too" emotional. The difference is that we are not supposed to be that way, so it is frowned on, we get embarassed and once again, our ego steps in and we lose the lesson. For example, in business, we're not supposed to cry right - tears being the release of the process when we truly see, rather than anger or the suppression thereof, thus repeating it again in the future.
I was in a sales meeting and one of our higher up bosses was visiting. He made an extremely condescending and abusive remark to me. I teared up, but knew, he couldn't have been the source that bothered me so much (who the heck was he right). Everyone was embarassed for me, but I recognized my button and let it flow - busting through past abuse and the emotionally traumatic pain I'd been holding onto. After the meeting, I went to him to thank him for being the divine intervention you speak of. He respected me tremendously and I lasted longer in that job than any of the others at the table (not to mention earning 3x the commission of the others because I'd busted through, they were stuck in "supposed to not" and ego blind spots)
Be you dear one - and see the thread of the deep emotions with a willingness to look at each moment in your life that thread has played out. It will all come from one, deeply traumatic experience that once seen, can be released. And you are right, every moment and every person on our path can be that gift to finally help us see some of the deep pain we've been holding onto.
I'd be happy to email you a chart from OneBrain that helps tremendously! Let me know if you'd like it.
Very touchy and inspirin. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for your visit and comment Philipo :)
Full circle! Great poem! Welcome home.
You and I have spoken of this
"I finally realized, their struggles are the same as mine."
I think this is finally the realization that you ARE free. Now enjoy your freedom!
Love to see that you are here.
luv u
JJL
Thanks JJ. This true realization does change the rest of my life. Not sure I could have come to it when my child was the age yours are now, or my spouse as dependent as yours but it could be done. As Deepak says, it's a question of letting go of the attachment to the roles and outcome to be a better traveler. Good luck to you in maintaining that detachment so the outcome you currently seek will include the best decisions for all concerned. Baraka Bashad my Friend...
don't know much about buddishm but i know the feeling of wanting to be free, it is a srong emotion indeed... enjoyed reading your hub
So very true Brenda! The desire to be free is probably the strongest of all - motivating and inspiring for strength and understanding beyond all human conditions and usual capabilities. So glad you came by and commented - thank you :)
Very nice, i love writing poems and reading good ones thank you.
Thank you Doyle :) Glad you came by and commented. Welcome to HP!
How did I miss this beautiful tribute to freedom? Thanks for sharing! You're a real tough cookie Syl, but in such a loving way. :)
Aloha my dear friend Lexi! A tough cookie? Hmmm, the chocolate chips are still fresh lol Delighted to see you here - maybe we see things when we can appreciate them more? You are loved dear sir - hope you had a fabulous trip filled with the feeling of freedom!
Smireles Level 1 Commenter 2 years ago
This is a very real issue in the lives of many people. Very good.